In our increasingly complex world, it's natural to want simple explanations. Easy answers and obvious villains make the world safer to navigate.
The problem is they don't exist. People create issues, and people are complicated.
In this series, "8 Rules for Discussing ‘Hot Topics' like Jesus Did," we are looking at 8 ways you can have better conversations on the most important topics facing us today. By taking these steps, you will understand others better, and more people will want to hear what you have to say.
The second rule for engaging controversial topics is remembering that everything is more complicated than you think! Don’t oversimplify.
No one person thinks exactly the same. As I mentioned in the first rule, "Remember, You're Biased," we are all shaped by unique histories, environments, and cultures - this makes consensus unlikely.
We all know this, and yet much of the polarity and tribalism in culture today is an inability or unwillingness to recognize just how complicated every issue is.
Both sides ignore the nuance and oversimplify the problems and solutions. We create false dichotomies and demand that everyone choose a side.
For example:
There should be no limits on what the government can do, or any version of the government is bad! Choose!
Everyone and everything is racist, or it's all just a myth. Choose!
A reasonable person wouldn't choose either option, and yet this is what a culture devoid of nuance demands: everything oversimplified.
Unfortunately, it's easy to fall into an "either/or" mindset.
Nothing has been more divisive in recent history than the proper way to respond to the COVID-19 pandemic. False dilemmas, straw-man arguments, and false dichotomies have been on proud display throughout this whole ordeal.
One mindset is that the whole thing is an overblown hoax. All measures to slow down or prevent the spread of the "virus" are a violation of our freedom.
On the other side, you have the "this is the end of the world” mentality. Any measure taken against the virus is justified regardless of the social, economic, or mental health consequences.
Both sides make no room for a different perspective.
We need to reject either extreme in favor of a more balanced approach. Oversimplifying complex issues is a guaranteed way to get nowhere when discussing contentious topics. Refuse the false dilemma, and have the courage to fight for nuance, because nothing is as simple as it seems.
This also means that people are ALWAYS more complicated than you think.
If we can box people up as "those" and "them," life would be much simpler. We are very tempted to put people into one of two categories: heroes and villains. It would be comforting if this was true, but we are all capable of good and evil.
People don't fit neatly into cultural, political, or ideological boxes either. I've met atheists who are open to the idea of God, liberals who are against abortion, and conservatives who want nothing to do with guns.
Every person is unique and complex. No one likes to be put in a box.
Be patient, and take the time to understand issues and those passionate about them before making up your mind.
This is the key to thoughtful discussions outside the church.